charcoal.

Well, lately, I don't know... it seems like I've been falling spiritually. I still remember analysing my spiritual walk for the past year at committee retreat. At a first glance, it seemed fine to me... I didn't feel as though I was falling or climbing... it was different that time. The image I got in my head was of a child in the middle of nowhere... and next to him was a latter and a rope. The rope represented a spiritual "fall" and the latter represented a "climb." BUT, this boy wasn't climbing the rope nor sliding down the rope. He was just in the middle of nowhere. He was lost. He's been lost for a long time. Oddly, this child was me. I feel lost in my spiritual walk. I have no clue where I am. I don't know whether or not I'm "supposed" to be climbing to the top or whether I should be falling right now. But atm, it seems like I'm falling. Not the greatest thing. I just feel so burnt up from school and a lot of things. Seems like I have TOO MANY DISTRACTIONS in my life that cover God's fire. Often, I remember the message that Sharon told us at CM retreat. She said that... God's always there (that fire of God)... BUT SOMETIMES you may feel cold and you feel no warmth... it's not because God moved away or left you... he's still there! The reason you're feeling cold is because there's SOMETHING BLOCKING GOD'S WARMTH.
It's going to be hard getting these distractions out of my life! There are too many. I just gotta FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS! Focus.
PRAY. fanku =)